A Personal Narrative

A well written narrative is the result of clear thinking that can easily be seen in good paragraphs. Kids need to develop an understanding of how to take their ideas and present them clearly, especially when they are writing about real events. In a creative story paragraphs develop naturally with the plot. But in a personal narrative, it’s harder for kids to hone in on a few important points and expand on each of them. My goal for this week’s writing lesson, then, was to teach kids how to write a personal narrative in which their ideas were organized into traditional paragraphs.

I did this lesson over three days. The first day was the hardest, when I modeled and guided them through planning the narrative. On the second day they wrote out their first draft, again while I modeled. I helped them proofread their first draft, fixed their spelling and sentence structure, and then they wrote out their final drafts.

The topic: My Best Friend

This tied into the Reading unit we just finished which focused on the theme of Friendship.

Day 1 – Planning

To start the lesson I handed each student a planning paper on which were four squares. Three of the squares were for drafting out paragraphs and the fourth was for a concluding sentence or two.  In each square there was a line for the main idea. Below that there were bullets for the details to go with each main idea.

I used my document camera for modeling the lesson. After explaining the writing assignment I asked the class for input.

We are going to write three paragraphs in our narrative. What should our three main ideas be?

The kids responded with the following ideas:

1. How we met
2. A description of the friend
3. Activities we do together

We wrote these main ideas on each top line of our four square planning paper.
Next it was time to think about the topic sentence for the first paragraph. I reminded them that a paragraph had to have a topic sentence followed by details. (A separate lesson on how to write a traditional paragraph should precede this assignment.) I asked for a suggestion. No response.
Not good. So I modeled a sentence on my paper. I met Jessica at my grandma’s house when I was four years old.  
Okay, I’m looking for someone who can come up with a topic sentence that is better than mine.

I could see some serious thinking suddenly going on. In a minute or so hands shot up.

I was two years old when I met John at his house.
Ann and I met on the first day of kindergarten.
It all started like this.
How did my friendship with Sarah start?

I instructed them to write out their topic sentence in the first square. It was time now to think of some details to add to this paragraph.
What details should we write in this paragraph? We don’t need to think of full sentences yet. Just share your ideas.

They had no problem suggesting the following which they jotted down beside each bullet:
1. When we met;
2. Where
3. How did it start.

On to paragraph 2. I reminded them that describing a person is both what they look like and also what they are like, i.e. their qualities.

We need a topic sentence for a paragraph describing your friend. Any suggestions?

Silence. Sure they were thinking, but I could tell that they were struggling. So, on my modeling paper, I wrote:
My best friend, Jessica, is beautiful in every way.

This led to a little more excitement and a few kids raised their hands. Here’s a sample of their responses:
 Ryan is a wonderful friend in every way. Alice is my fantastic, best friend. John is kindhearted every single second. My best friend is wonderful on the inside and the outside. This is what my best friend is like.

After more ideas were shared everyone was able to get their second topic sentence written. When I asked for ideas for details they again found this part easy – height, hair, an attractive quality – and jotted them down beside each bullet in the second square.

The third paragraph was accomplished in pretty much the same fashion. We worked through the paragraphs quite efficiently. I modeled a concluding sentence and then encouraged them to come up with their own to end the narrative.

This is a student sample.

Day 2 – The First Draft

I explained to my students that they would now write a narrative using the ideas in their four square plan. Using the document camera, I placed my plan and writing paper side by side for them to see. As I wrote sentences for each paragraph, I asked them to write out theirs. I encouraged them to try to be different, but I didn’t insist on this.

Often, when a teacher models to the extent that I did on this assignment, it is tempting for kids to just copy what they see. In this particular case I found that some kids did indeed write most of what I had written, but made sufficient changes to make it appropriate for them. I think a topic like this, though not wildly exciting like writing a Greek myth, is an excellent way to get kids comfortable with some essential writing skills. Since they were writing about something that they could easily relate to, it was easy for them to take a model and work with it to apply to themselves.

I think it’s fine for developing writers to copy good writing. It lowers their anxiety, but trains their brain to think like a writer.

Day 3 – Editing/Revising/Final Draft

Each student brought their first draft to me and I helped them fix their spelling mistakes. I limited the revising to altering clunky sentences to clear, snappy ones. This phase had to go fast, and it did. With all that guidance most of the kids made very few mistakes. To end this entry, here is the final draft produced by one of my students.